My friend called me fat.
She said I shouldn’t wear anything form fitting. Fat from my stomach was visible in most all my clothes and I guess it didn’t look attractive.
She suggested I wear a slimmer, you know, to keep all the fat from showing.
I bought one the next day.
It felt like I was putting on something made for someone 3x smaller than me.
What is this material anyways?
I struggled but managed to pull it up over my thighs and around my stomach. I got it right up under my boobs so it would stay put. Fingers crossed.
I put my dress on.
It definitely made a difference. My fat was all squished and stuffed inside the slimmer. I looked smaller, thinner.
My friend said it was more attractive to not show your fat.
All day I wore the slimmer. Going to the bathroom was torture. I hate how big I am. Once I lose the weight this wont be a problem.
That night when I got home and took off my clothes to shower, my skin was red in places from where the slimmer was digging into my skin.
My friend reminded me that beauty is pain and not to complain about it. She said: “You wouldn’t want people to look at you and see how big you’ve gotten. Until you lose the weight you really need to hide how chunky you are.”
She’s right. I’ve gained weight and it’s disgusting.
Sweet reader, the friend who called me fat was me, my thoughts.
How often do we tell ourselves that we’re ugly, disgusting, fat, chunky, less than, a loser, not pretty enough, gross, etc.
I know that I have had my “friend” say the most horrible things about myself.
I never thought it mattered because it was my own thoughts and no one would hear them. I could fake confidence and pretend like I wasn’t hurting inside.
But think about telling a real friend, another person, the same negative things you say to yourself.
How do you think that would go?
I guarantee that you would do a lot of damage to that person and probably not keep them as a friend for very long.
We have to stop believing the lies that having FAT makes you undesirable, less than, unattractive, and is a negative thing.
This is a lie that has been pushed and pushed so that people will keep buying products to improve themselves.
Fat is just fat. It’s not something that defines beauty or health.
I urge you to start talking positively to yourself.
Your body is beautiful and I don’t care what size you are. Your body is the dwelling place for your soul. It’s valuable and precious. It should be loved and cared for.
Our thoughts have so much impact on our well being and quality of life.
If you wouldn’t say it to someone else, don’t say it to yourself.
I am not ashamed of my fat. I have found freedom in accepting my body as it is and not pursuing a lifestyle that would make me thinner.
I am on a journey of being healthy but it has nothing to do with my size now.
It’s incredibly liberating.
Remember, kind words. Be sweet to yourself.